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Post by durhamlass on Aug 21, 2009 13:21:14 GMT -8
You look at yourself and feel disappointed so need comfort so round you go again.
How do you respond when your family tell you that people will not start to take you seriously unless you lose at least some of the 100lbs of extra weight you are carrying? Your business will suffer if you don't. You won't find anyone who will look at you as a future partner if you don't. In fact everything that you want to happen is probably not happening because you are so heavy.
Why bother to make an effort as it won't make much of a difference?
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Post by leslie on Aug 21, 2009 17:37:20 GMT -8
Hi Durhamlass, I can certainly understand what you are saying about being disappointed in yourself; I often feel disappointed in myself, too. But we must wash our minds with the water of the Word and learn to believe what God says about us, discounting all else as lies. It is not easy because sometimes the truth (what God has said) seems to fade against our circumstances. Nevertheless, we must choose to believe God. He will not change; circumstances will.
Our culture today puts so much emphasis on the way one looks, weight in particular... and I dare say we may even judge ourselves more harshly.
For years, my heart's cry has been that people would look past my body, sometimes even past my behavior, and see me for who I really am - the blood bought child of God who is worthy to be loved and accepted. When they don't - or I percieve they don't - I take my disappointment and grief to the refrigerator.
Guess who I am making god? Not the refrigerator (food); that is only the high place where I sacrifice to my gods. Who am I making god? The very people who hurt me; they become my gods! And when I don't please them, I sacrifice myself. I destroy my health and my looks by eating too much or the wrong food. And then those same people turn on me again for my failures (or so I think) and it's back to the sacrifice board! It's crazy!
The only opinion that is of any value is our Father God's. He sees us as He has designed us to be and that's like His son, Jesus, full of the Fruit of the Spirit, including self control. That's you!
Another thing we need to remember when discouraging remarks are sent our way: We have an enemy but it is not people. Our battle against the accuser of the brethren is fought - and won - with God's Word. You are in a spiritual battle; you can win!
As to what can you say to family members with negative comments? Jesus did not defend himself against His accusers. In Mark 15:3 "the chief priests accused him of many things; but He answered nothing." Perhaps you should not respond; or perhaps God will give you an appropriate scripture which you could say lovingly.
But, at any rate, I would be sure to have on hand (written on cards is good) several scriptures to read to yourself to battle any negative word spoken against you. You are an overcomer! God said so. Thru Him we willl find the way to making Him Lord of all, including our bodies.
In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, I bless you with a deeper knowledge of who you are in Him and a revelation of the fact that you are the Apple of His Eye. I bless you with a desire to delight yourself in the Lord and the joy to believe He will give you the desires of your heart.
Leslie
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Post by Teresa on Aug 21, 2009 18:26:08 GMT -8
. How do you respond when your family tell you that people will not start to take you seriously unless you lose at least some of the 100lbs of extra weight you are carrying? Your business will suffer if you don't. You won't find anyone who will look at you as a future partner if you don't. In fact everything that you want to happen is probably not happening because you are so heavy. Wow, that is a lot of cursing that has come your way. Ouch! I can see how that would make you feel "bad" about yourself. Even though it is a lie of the enemy, it feels "true" and it is hard to shake because of the curse empowerment of the enemy against your perception of who you are. I am guessing that you will benefit greatly from some curse breaking ministry. It is hard to have a realistic/honest view about yourself when so many inputs are so negative. But the good news is that God sees who you really are. He doesn't look at you and the the "body mass" that some other important people in your life are getting sidetracked by. He sees you...the person who He created and the destiny on your life and the gifts and anointings that you carry (even if you can't see them yourself right now). But God sees (and likes) who you really are and He wants to break the power of those negative words off of you.
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Post by Teresa on Aug 21, 2009 20:13:56 GMT -8
After reading about the devastating curses that had been spoken against Durhamlass, I felt that I had to write an article on how to deal with curses (e.g, break them). I use the specific curses from her post as an example in the article, but it will work for any type of curses. So if you have any curses that you think are operating against you, please take a look at: www.godspeak.net/his-lordship/lordship_5.html
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dodi
Junior Member
Posts: 60
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Post by dodi on Aug 21, 2009 23:46:57 GMT -8
I am looking forward to reading what Tersea has shared. What i see/feel as I read your post and leslies response is a heart that is being so open before GOD. There is so much pain and sorrow that we carry...I know I do/did.... when we come into agreement with what others have said about us and even what we say about ourselves. I pray for you and for me and for all of us that the lies that we believe (especially about who we are) will during this time be revealed and replaced with the truth, which is what God says about us. And that as those lies are replaced our body image will change and we will become who He created us to be and that our bodies will line up to that as well. Also that as we walk along the journey to submission and change of life long patterns and ways of thinking that we will encounter in a deeper and deeper way the love of God for us. I love the phrase we so often hear, that says God loves us just as we are right now but at the same time he loves us too much to leave us there.....Father bless you.
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dodi
Junior Member
Posts: 60
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Post by dodi on Aug 21, 2009 23:55:29 GMT -8
That was a great teaching. Thank you. I have a question after reading it...In your opinion does that break us loose from the false pictures of who we are? I am in the healing ministry (emotional) and have felt that the removal of curses sets us free for receiving the next step of the healing of the emotional scars and sometimes the false pictures of "who we are". Like it seems that often the two go hand in hand. Just wondering and thank you again for sharing that wonderful truth about breaking curses over ourselves. What a simple way to share truth with another too.
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Post by durhamlass on Aug 22, 2009 1:31:41 GMT -8
I have struggled with feeling rejected for most of my life. In fact the big turn around came in July 2005 but I am still working through the consequences of decades of wrong thinking.
My mother's response was maybe if you do this or stop doing that then people will want you. End result is I have collected a whole series of reasons why other people may not want me and a long list of what I should be doing to make people want me.
Not only that I made many wrong and damaging choices along the way because of these issues. End result was that I was trapped in a long and abusive marriage, with no contact with my family for about a third of it. A situation made worse because our daughter left us to live with my parents when she was 13 because she could not cope with her dad's problems.
For a long time putting weight on was the least of my problems! It was something to tackle later when there are not as many other issues to think about. Life is easier in some ways now as I no longer have contact with someone who regularly hurt me. However I am still dealing with the aftereffects of that situation. I suppose if it took decades to get into a situation you cannot expect instant results when you get out.
It has only been 4 years since I screamed at God get me out of here so that I can serve you better. It was then that he acted on his girlfriend's advice to divorce me. I moved first into temporary accommodation before home before being given a permanent home a year later. So I had all the practicalities of decorating, moving things and adding to what I had twice! I moved out of the town I had lived for 20 years to the next one and settled into a new church. All the time trying to get my mental/emotional/spiritual act together enough so that I could find work and or develop a business.
January 2005 I met my dad at their nearest railway station and was only sure that it was him when when I was next to him and asked if he was waiting for someone. It was so long since we had seen each other that it took hearing each other to be certain who we were. January 2007 I met my mum and dad at my nearest railway station and took them to look at a house that they bought for me the following day. They have suffered through all of this as well but somehow I still have a family.
See what I mean about losing weight having to take its place in terms of priority of what to deal with next. This current season it seems to be more the emotional/mental/spiritual area that is needing attention and that includes losing weight.
Susan
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Post by Teresa on Aug 22, 2009 6:28:43 GMT -8
See what I mean about losing weight having to take its place in terms of priority of what to deal with next. This current season it seems to be more the emotional/mental/spiritual area that is needing attention and that includes losing weight. Susan Susan, as you have already suggested, this is something that you are going to have to sort out with the Lord. We can't choose the priorities in which you should deal with things and tell you what they are. He knows you and He knows what you need. It is, of course, important that you choose to work with Him and let Him start making changes. However, this much I can say with some certainty. At some point you are going to have to release forgivingness to everyone who has wronged/hurt/misunderstood you. I personally don't believe we can loose the weight and maintain it (keep it off) if we haven't dealt with unforgivingness, because the devil latches onto the unforgivingness and uses it as a "legal excuse" to torment us--and in most of our lives, excess weight and all of it's related problems are one of the ways the enemy torments us. I know it is a huge thing to truly forgive assorted hurts/wrongs. I thought I'd done it in my own life and the Lord has recently been throwing things in my face that show me I have "way too much" unforgivingness and offense left in me. I am currently working with Him to try and get rid of it, and it is a much longer and more difficult thing to do. I am sure the Lord wants to bring healing to your pain and that He wants to do a truth encounter to break the lies and "wrong self image" that are so easy to develop when people judge who we are based on our appearance. And I am sure He wants to deal with the physical side and have us start changing our eating and behaviors and exercise to get our body healthier (and smaller). And I also believe He wants to deal with the spiritual side and make us more secure in His love for us and draw us closer to Him, as well as having us improve our level of personal holiness before Him. But I can't tell you which order He will want to do these things in. He has a personalized plan for each of us, and the way He does you is probably not going to be the same as the way He does me, etc. If you are having problems sorting out God's order for you, then my suggestion is to start working on forgiveness, because unforgivingness is the single thing that makes it hardest to hear His voice and perceive His direction for us. Heaven knows, most of us on the his-lordship forum have a number of things that we need to forgive. Then, as we work on releasing all unforgivingness in us, we have to trust God to reach down and somehow manage to communicate to us what He wants us to do next as we seek Him and ask Him. He is,after all, all powerful and capable of making His wishes known to us. But I do agree with you that when there is a lot to work on, it can be overwhelming and hard to know where to start. However, it seems to me that you have already made a good start by coming here and sharing your heart and struggles with us--with others who are also trying to work through bringing an out-of-control area of our lives under His lordship. So hopefully the Lord will start showing you more clearly what to do next. That may come as a clear directoin..where He speaks to you in that still small voice in a way you recognize that it is Him. Or it may come a bit more subtly.. you may be reading someone else's testimony and God sort of quickens a part of it to you as what He wants you to do next. Even if the path isn't totally clear for you, at least you have started moving. As that saying goes...it is easier to steer a moving car than a parked one. - teresa
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